I wrote this letter to my oldest daughter Tamara as she left for the Midwest and Palmer Chiropractic College 1989
I wanted to find the perfect gift for you, but nothing seemed right. I decided instead to give you a farewell wish, to send you on your way. And sometimes the best things ever said come last. People talk for hours saying nothing much, then stand at the door with words that are suddenly very important.
You are standing at the door to a new adventure and I want to say a few parting words, the kind that last in memory and heart. And although my skills leave much to be desired, there are so many things I want to share with you.
The door is open and you enter a world that runs about as smoothly as a car with square wheels. It is ok to be uncertain; this world is run by leaders who behave at times like children. Adulthood comes on you and suddenly ready or not, your it.
The day before yesterday, you were that fragile little baby that seemed so helpless. Yesterday you were that nine year-old that loved horses more than eating. Only this morning you were a teenager I handled so badly.
If you always put your heart into everything you do, you cannot lose. If you never make a lot of money, no one will be able to take the wonder out of your life. In today’s world, The Golden Rule seems to be lost, make sure it is always in your pocket.
It is a complicated world where we need to constantly make choices. A peach is sweet beneath the fuzz, a toad is more than warts, and a person is not just, what you see. If we can learn to make those wise distinctions than we can be tolerant, we can get to the heart of problems, instead of wrestling with gross exteriors.
When a person grows up, they start making their own assumptions. I am sure I fed you my bias and prejudice through the windows in which I viewed the world, I hope some are good. Now you challenge your own and you will see through your own windows. Sometimes they get clouded and need washing and new light comes in. It is always better to be wise rather than smart. It sometimes takes a long time to find wisdom; it is a lifetime search. The greatest knowledge sometimes comes in the most unexpected places from the most unexpected people.
You have an edge, not because I was a shining example of Christian endeavor, but because God would never let go of me long enough for me to completely turn my back. And he wound his way in and out of my life long enough, for you to know him too.
No matter how loving or loved we are, when that moment comes and you feel that cold loneliness, you will face it and win, God will not turn his back on you.
You are already in motion in your life, more prepared to face the world than I was at your age, more prepared to push off and make a good start. You may better understand why people of every country and religion have at one time or another found it so easy to make other people suffer. While a country glued to their TV’s cheering for a little girl caught in a mineshaft, will destroy a village and everyone in it, in a country they cannot identify on a map.
And while you are trying to figure all that out, remember that every right you have as a women was won for you by women fighting hard. And little girls born today need you to help pave their way. In a man’s world, it takes courage to maintain and extend the range of equality. And you need to continue to add to the pot for the women in line behind you.
There is plenty to keep you busy for the rest of your life. And being busy cannot promise that life’s absurdity will be made smaller, but with faith, it can be manageable. With faith, you will occasionally feel that overall, things do more forward. And if you focus that hope on your life’s discontent, Gods light will melt many shadows.
I want you to be strong, aggressive, tough and resilient, yet full of feeling. I want you to do good when you can, hold on to your wit and intelligence and use it like a shield against people who would injure you. Laugh and enjoy a life of your own choosing and a world of your own making. I want you to be everything that makes you unique. When you enter strange oceans, don’t leave any of yourself safely on shore. Go bravely into unexplored territory.
C only get there by hard work and risk and sometimes not knowing just what your doing. My hope is that what you discover will be wonderful and in that discovery, you will find yourself.
And by the way, I love you,
Mom
Tamara graduated and now has her own practice
Health Quest Chiropractic
1760 State Street
Schenectady, N. Y. 12304
No comments:
Post a Comment